It’s that time again - time to scour my analog reports for interesting search queries! (I smushed the August and September monthly stat compilations together for this post, ’cause September was just generally nutso.)

modelboys

Sicko. Get your pr0n fix elsewhere.

sarah steelman

Ran for state treasurer on a platform of “no gay marriage 3V4R!”, and won the Republican nomination as a result. Most people tend to run for that office based on their accounting credentials, or based on their ideas for improving the efficiency of state government, or based on their record as a waste-fighter. Apparently, Sarah didn’t think any of those were important; all that matters to her is keeping those icky icky gay people from having any sort of legal recognition, equality or economic benefit be damned.

jumpy
jimmy jumpy

Cut back on the caffeine, then.

barack obama

Quite a guy. If I lived in Illinois, I’d vote for ‘im.

kerry t shirts
pro kerry t shirts
john kerry t shirts
cheap democratic t shirts

obama speech text

dahlia lithwick

obama speech review

anti kerry t shirts

jumpy house

bit torrent good eats

troy in fifteen minutes

kenny hulshoff

vitamins in onion

jumpy webbrowser

rent a jumpy house

fahrenheit 911 ticket sales

firefox jumpy

Is it just Firefox, or do other programs get “jumpy” too? If it’s the latter, then check on your monitor and display adapter.

hr puff n stuff pictures

2004 05 marathons

altoids national convention

“We, the Cinnamon delegates, nominate John Kerry…”

bon appetit stl kosher

recipe for indian dessert called gulab jamun

I’ll post it separately — look here.

mo pho blog

Do you maybe mean Mo-Pho, the MObile PHOto blog? Or perhaps the bestest drag king around, Mo Faux?

people lack of vitamins pic

Look on images.google.com for “beriberi“, “pellagra“, “scurvy“, or “rickets“. There are other diseases that result from vitamin deficiencies, but I think those four will give you the most graphic pics.

apathy in marriage

vitamins for steer

I found a decent site summarizing nutrition in beef cattle, which discusses some of the basic issues.

vitamins for hearing

July’s search engine results. I’m beginning to think May’s were just flukily good.

jimmy jumpy

Perhaps you were looking for a Johnny Jump-Up, that fabu baby exerciser that consists of a cloth seat and some badass elastic bands.

modelboys

Since including that term, I have discovered that yes, there is a pr0n site by that name. Lovely.

kerry t shirts

Here.

sarah steelman

Don’t like her. (She’s the Republican candidate for MO state treasurer, and I don’t think she’s very qualified.)

john kerry t shirts

Here.

lightninging

Love that word.

poll 3rd congressional district missouri 2004

There really hadn’t been any polls done prior to the primary.

mike matheny handsome

Yes, he is. R* is especially enamored of him.

link:ufoyieetgqej:www.osnews.com/story.php?news_id=6282

Um, nice to meet you too.

cute food

Cute bento pics

mozilla jumpy

Define “jumpy”, please. It may be your video or mouse drivers, or an outdated version.

mikel moore fahrenheit 911

You’ll do better if you spell his first name right - it’s “Michael”.

dahlia lithwick

Good stuff. She has a recent article on the Congressional Accountability for Judicial Activism Act of 2004 (”courts can’t review the constitutionality of some of our laws, neener”) that is an excellent read.

backdoor.jeem

Can I at least see some pics first?

jumpy house

Get under a sturdy table or desk, or brace yourself in a doorway.

car game free

I’ve always been fond of the alphabet game, where you look first for an “A” in things around you, then a “B”, “C”, etc.; I Spy; and the game where you have to make a word from the sequence of letters in other cars’ non-vanity license plates.

vitamins for doves

Um. I don’t know. Try one of your other results, please.

barack obama

Whatta guy.

link:www.osnews.com/story.php?news_id=6282

Have we already met?

vitamins

A, D, E, and K are lipid-soluble, so you shouldn’t overdo them.

These aren’t as good as May’s, damn it. Unfortunately, it looks like all the results with the lowest hit counts were left unlisted by analog, and based on what I remember from my occasional trips through the access logfile, all the good stuff only had one or two hits. *sigh.*

kerry t shirts

Check out either his official site or DOTWHO.

john kerry t shirts

Um, see above.

david sirota sexy

He is, isn’t he?

sexy david sirota

Um, yes, he is, isn’t he?

cute food

I believe you’re looking for this site, with its anime-and-manga-in-bento-format pics.

jeem

That’s me! However, “jeem” is also the name of the fifth letter of the Arabic alphabet (if you have the right stuff installed, it looks like this: ﺝ ), a Trojan horse (sometimes called “Backdoor.Jeem” - hee!), Journal of Environmental Economics and Management, and an advice columnist for a Pakistani GLBT webzine (”Uncle Jeem”).

sardine can antenna

Nifty, eh?

dahlia lithwick

I like her stuff, but this is not the place to find it. Go to Slate.com.

troy in fifteen minutes

Funny, funny stuff.

fahrenheit 9/11 torrent -trailer

Sorry, no dice. Go see it in the theater; the ticket sales should help prove that PEOPLE WANT TO KNOW, DAMMIT.

fanatical apathy

I’ve only posted one link to that site so far (specifically to the bitterly sardonic piece on gay marriages), but it’s pretty damned good overall. Go read.

knuckleball wait until it stops and pick it up

Bob Uecker said it, and it’s a rather brilliant strategy.

how is drupal pronounced

I’ve heard it as either DROO-päl (ä=the broad A in “hat”) or DROO-pəl, but usually as DROO-pəl. (Oh, I so love the schwa character…)

fornicate

Sounds like a plan to me! BTW, I am shocked! shocked! to discover that, at this writing, I am the 13th-highest search result for that word.

missouri fahrenheit 9/11

The official ticket-sales site has a list of theaters in my fair state.

vitamins for torn achilles

OUCH! How in the world did you tear THAT? Personally, my vitaminic recommendation for a torn Achilles’ tendon is lots and lots of gin, but you should really see a doctor about such an injury.

good eats bit torrent

Not sure I can help you there, though I do love that show.

voting at 16

I’m torn on the issue myself, but it isn’t really an issue here in the States. UK readers (do I have any?) should go check out votesat16.org.uk.

fahrenheit 911 mikel moore

You’ll do better if you spell his name “Michael”.

dsl ack

DSL NAK at the moment, actually — have just completed a bit of a spat with my ex-ISP and am in the process of moving to a new one; while their stuff is en route, though, I don’t have DSL at home.

Let’s hope July comes out better search-wise.